Eureka! Moment #4: Dalgona Coffee

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If you’re following me on Twitter or Instagram you would probably know that I love coffee. My day wouldn’t be complete without drinking a cup of coffee in the morning, not only does it keep me awake, it also gives me the energy to get things done.

At this time, I couldn’t get may usual Starbucks or Tim Hortons or Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf fix because of obvious quarantine reasons. I intensely miss having a cup of Starbucks’ Caramel Macchiato (sometimes White Chocolate Mocha) or Tim Hortons’ infamous iced coffee with your choice of flavoring (i.e., caramel, mocha, or vanilla).

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You Are What Matters

“I saw that my life was a vast glowing empty page and I could do anything I wanted.” – Jack Kerouac

We’re kind of iffy when it comes to exploring things out of our comfort zone. What makes it a problem is that most of us would rather stick with the same familiar pain that have been hurting us for quite a long time. We settle for the pain that we’ve been trying to fix rather than just dive into a foreign one where new things await us — maybe with even lesser pain. Most of the time we’re overthinking about how we don’t want to mess things up — crowding our minds with the thought that we might be making the wrong decision or for most of us, we’re all just afraid of not being able to meet the standards that were built for us by other people — family, society, and friends.

Almost two years ago, I was bound to make a decision that will change a big part of my life. I was so eager to choose what I know is best for me and what I know for sure will make me happy, and that’s exactly what I did regardless of what other people might think of me. It wasn’t a very smooth journey and there were a lot of rough times, but up to this day, it is still one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

There are still other situations where it’s really hard to get it inside our minds to stop overthinking and just go for what we feel is right. Of course, it has always been easier said than done when we’re choosing between what we’ve grown too accustomed to and something entirely new. Personally, there were some situations in my life recently where I’ve been trying to tell myself that I shouldn’t care what these people think. A cornucopia of thoughts keep flooding up my mind and it’s not really mentally healthy anymore — these people tend to make me compare myself with someone else as if that person is the “standards” that I have to meet when I know for a fact that I am capable of doing way better. I know for sure that I am also capable of being the best person that I can be.

To be honest, I will never be like the person they prefer, because I know that in my own little ways, I am better and I am slowly trying to make as much progress in my life so that I can one day turn into the person I’ve always wanted to be; not what they think I should be. It’s okay to never meet someone’s standards, we don’t live for them anyways.

I know that there are days when we feel so down that no matter how many times a day we tell ourselves that we got this and that we are better than what they think — that they shouldn’t matter, at the back of my mind, it still does and it sucks that we’re having a hard time burying those thoughts away. I truly want to set myself free of all the chains that are preventing me to move forward but I also know that it takes time to rid myself of the poison in my head.

Slowly, that day will come, one step at a time. I just need to keep reminding myself that there are so many ways to live, and if I continue letting these people pull me down, I will end up in the pits of somewhere I don’t belong to. Sometimes our prison is our own mind, but please take some time to think things through and realize that we shouldn’t let these negative thoughts slow us down.

So to everyone feeling the same way, please always remember that there is so much beauty in each day. Free yourself of the prison that is your mind. May we all emancipate ourselves from this. We’ll all get through this.

Reading Shamelessly

In my country, being a bully is a thing when you’re in elementary. Back in the day, a lot of kids think that bullying gives them power and confidence which allows them to make the rules and trample on everyone who gets in their way. I wasn’t very popular, and some of my classmates made fun of me just for the sake of having someone to make fun of. I know I’m not the only person in the world who experienced this, but that doesn’t make me feel better. If anything, thinking about it and all those kids who’ve gone through the same thing saddens me even more.

Those elementary days were a tough phase for most of us. At the time, it used to make me sad, heck, I even come home crying on some days. However, I found solace in books. My books were the ones who stuck by me during those rough years of my life. I read a lot of Goosebumps, Nancy Drew, and Hardy Boys back then and they made me happy.

A couple of years later, one of those Scholastic Book Fairs was held in our school for the first time (which became an annual bookish event in our campus), and I was introduced to other genres. I stumbled upon Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone by J.K. Rowling and up to this day, I am so happy that I picked it up all those years ago because it not only got me into reading fantasy and dystopian books, it also gave me the opportunity to travel and enter different countries and worlds without moving my feet.

Then, one day, I stumbled upon a box of all of my mom’s and aunt’s old books which consists of those little Sweet Valley High and Babysitters Club books along with some of Nicholas Sparks novels. I started reading them and was introduced to a new genre and an entirely different perspective.

At a young age, I was completely in love with chick lit. It instantly became on of my favorites. There were times when I would stay up so late reading books, bawling my eyes out because of how a Nicholas Sparks novel ended and I found myself wanting to read more and more books — I just couldn’t get enough. To this day, Nicholas Sparks is still my all-time favorite author when it comes to the contemporary romance genre.

Given that I was one of the target of bullies when I was in elementary, I didn’t have a lot of friends. Some of them even made fun of me because I liked reading books, called me a nerd, a dork, and other awful things. At some point, I stopped bringing my books in school. It was terrible but I never really let go of reading because why would I? They are my escape from this cruel world.

The few friends that I have wasn’t really that into reading so I didn’t have anyone to share my insights and feelings with. In high school, I decided to never let anyone bully me again. I did not turn into a bully myself, but I found the courage to talk back to people who say bad things about me. I managed to gain a bigger group of friends who I’m still friends with up to this day and the most important thing is most of them liked to read novels, too.

It was in the end of my high school years that I found out about John Green, Jenny Han, Paulo Coelho, and so many other authors. Then I lost track of the years. I read and devoured so many books in those years until college — until today.

To be honest, I would like to thank those bullies in my elementary years because if it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t have found out about the comfort and joy that books bring — I wouldn’t have fallen in love with reading. How about you? What’s that one bookish story you will never forget? What made you read books? Do you still remember the first book you’ve ever read? Tell me in the comments, I’d love to engage in your bookish journey.

Also, here are some links that I enjoyed reading online in the past couple of weeks of quaratine-ing:

 

What I Wore #6: On Most Days, I Wear Pink

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For those of you who have visited or stumbled upon my blog at least once or twice, you probably noticed that I have a soft spot for the color pink. It’s been my favorite ever since I was a kid and I have never really outgrown my love for it, even today (obviously). Most of my things are pink, even the walls of my room and my door. Continue reading

26 Titles Since Year 1

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Photo taken by: JNVQ

It’s my birthday today, and this quarantine kind of sucks because I can’t celebrate it with the one person I would have loved to spend it with but I just keep in mind that this is all for the best. We need to stay separated for a while now, so that we can spend more birthdays together in the future.

For the past couple of years, I’ve been doing blog posts about the lessons I’ve learned in my x number of years here on Earth. This year, I thought that maybe I could tweak the concept a little because to be honest, I’m running out of lessons to take note of. Not that I do not learn new things anymore, but it’s just so hard to jot them down year after year. Also, to be honest, I feel like most of the lessons I write were carried over from the past year. So yeah, that concept kinda gets boring in time.

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